Love those who have

Wilson Orhiunu

First Gentleman with Wilson Orhiunu

Email: babawill2000@gmail.com Twitter: @Babawilly

The line that separates inspiration and intimidation is thin indeed. Meeting someone who has what we have been striving for without success catches our attention totally. We focus on them and in an instant, depending on our mind-set decide to either dislike them and be intimidated by them or to love them and look closer to see if we can copy some of their habits and implement them in our own life.

There is also a middle ground. Those that at first are intimidated with a polished and “finished article” and remain awestruck for a few weeks feeling paralysed to take action. “What is the point?” is the question they ask themselves for they have come close to an insurmountable mountain and their inadequacies have been laid bared before their eyes. Slowly they recover and start to take little steps in the direction of greatness.  There might be fears that the dream will not be attained but the inspired person still says “if not me, then my children” and marches on.

It is a privilege to have the opportunity to meet people who crossed the bridge you intend to cross. Questions could be asked and lessons learnt.

However for many it is a lost opportunity. Many have told me how arrogant and proud people of high net worth are. On probing further you find that there are no grounds for these conclusions.

Imagine meeting someone who is a household name. He or she does not know your name or face and you walk up to them and start chatting away like you are a long lost relative. What else would you expect?

The household name shrinks inwards and seeks a way of escape.

I remember once walking out of the loo at the Eko Hotel, Lagos during a musical concert and I saw a show business impresario whom I had admired since 1980 (who is now a Senator in Nigeria)  walking towards the loo.

My first reaction was, “so he uses the toilet?”

I felt the urge to walk up to him and tell him the long story of how much I admired him but I saw how his steps quickened as he walked in and how his hands  instinctively moved towards his zip before he got to the urinals.  I said, “Good evening Sir” and did not test his ability to forever hold his piss.

If I had however tried to stop him for an unsolicited chat and he was rude, which right thinking person would blame him? Should he wet himself because I am a fan?

Rather, this was an important moment for me.

I know his achievements but on seeing him use the loo like me, it dawned on me that he was a man like me. Anything he can do, I can do. All I needed to do was apply myself to my work and talents the way he has applied himself to his.

Focus

People help us focus. No matter the books we read about attaining a goal in life, one who has achieved it is the best ‘book’ to read. What we focus on has a way of materialising in our lives. Love is all about focus. The phrase that is used by lovers, “you mean the world to me”, clearly shows how much focus love can generate. Despite all the distracting wars and the billions of people with individual issues, the love struck is fixated on just one person who they love to learn about. The one on your mind all day changes you in some way. Love for a mentor also gives the advantage of focus, accelerates the learning and helps in the extraction of every good trait worth emulating.

As a man thinketh

Proverbs 23:7: For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.

Thoughts attract their kinsmen. If you think about how talented and hardworking people are, the ability to work at your talents effectively starts to seek you out.

The reverse is also true. Hating those with money scares money away from you. Being cynical of those who seem to hug the limelight repels the limelight from you.

All things are yours

Every single glamorous sight to behold was placed there for your enjoyment. Every talented singer only exists because you have a sense of hearing and every accomplished dancer exists only because you have eyes.

Talents are there to lift the observers to a higher state of existence and not to intimidate. A wife might bake a loaf for her man but the whole street enjoys the aroma. They could grumble or they could follow the trail and ask for a recipe and soon the whole street has bread to eat.

Even the glorious sunshine belongs to everybody. Why hate what is yours? Enjoy the sights. If a guy has a big yacht, don’t become cynical and start to say “you cannot take it with you when you die”. Rather enjoy the view as he shows you how fast his yacht can go.