Talk with Pamela
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How to get your intimacy back depends on what caused the break in transmission in the first place. Let us look at some issues that can cause getting out of action in the first place.
- Temporary separation
Sometimes when partners get separated after some time, the desire for intercourse just wanes so that when they come back together, the desire to engage in intimately with each other is low or becomes non-existent. When this occurs, there is need for intervention.
- Medical reasons
A state of general unwell dampens desire. Some medical conditions can actually prevent someone from getting her/his groove swinging. Surgery, medications for diabetes or hypertension are likely culprits. Be reminded that medications for these ailments cause a drop in libido.
A person suffering from post-traumatic stress definitely will not have intercourse on her mind. It is left for the partner to offer support in the area that elicited the stress. Some stresses can be sorted out by intimacy no doubt. So the partner has to understand what the issues are or consult a therapist to handle the situation for them.
- After childbirth, the lady should naturally be allowed a few weeks healing and recovery period. If it is a virginal birth, the birth canal will still be sore. That is not the time for any intense thrusting. Let her heal. If she had a Caesarean birth, popularly known as CS, her birth canal will not be sore but the internal wounds need some time to heal also. So the fear from the anticipated pain from both methods of childbirth requires that the male partner is patient and understanding. Even after the recovery, re-introduction has to be gentle and loving.
- After a disagreement
Some people can hold a grudge for Africa!! Small quarrel, they will not talk to each other. One will cook and the other will not eat, or one will refuse to cook. At night they will sleep backing each other. Worse if they have separate bedrooms.
How can you get back into action if you are quarrelling with your partner? Makeup and return to reset mode.
- Mental illness
Despite the social stigma, due largely to ignorance, psychological disorders can actually get one out of the mode. Depression, bipolar disorder, general anxiety disorder or some things emanating from emotional and domestic abuse either during this relationship or a previous one. Couples should support each other. Start with a lot of talking, getting to know each other all over again.
If you are struggling with getting your groove back or you observe your partner is having difficulties and you do not know how to be of assistance please talk with Pamela.