Wilson Orhiunu

First Gentleman with Wilson Orhiunu

Email: Twitter: @Babawilly

Lukewarm love is inferior to passionate hatred. The warm blooded hater has a higher chance of transforming into an ally than a ‘lukewarmite’ too envious to love and too cowardly to express their acrimony. They just keep on looking in hope of a day they would pull the trigger of their loaded gun to unleash the “I knew it” bullet.  They stalk like a vulture, patiently waiting to feast on failure. They lie when they say “I knew it” when someone comes to great success. They knew nothing, for if they knew it they would have said it.

Rather they hoped for failure. If success peradventure came, they would have applauded lukewarmly but with another man’s failure the party can really start.

Social media is always awash with videos of dead musicians as soon as the news about their demise breaks. This is why death is viewed as a good career move for some music stars.  People who have never posted a video of the deceased or attended their live shows suddenly begin to mourn on social media as if their right arm had been cut off.  ‘Lukewarmites’ love the dead but are unable to celebrate the living.

While it is beneficial to have enthusiastic encouragers among those who observe us, there is the other end of the spectrum that must be avoided. There are individuals who are addicted to being reaffirmed and validated every minute of the day. Compliments addicts act and behave like fishermen with leaking nets. They fish for compliments from dawn to dusk and throw tantrums and accusations when they don’t get them. All the kind words they catch are never remembered due to the gaps in their nets. We have all experienced that heart dropping sensation that comes when a close friend asks “can you notice anything different about me?”

You look and see no change. Next minute you are apologising for not noticing that the nails have been cut 4mm shorter. It is a drain to have a friend like this.

We must know who is who among those around us. The compliments addict will never encourage someone else as they are consumed with the purpose of their journey as a compliment seeking missile. They explode whenever the compliments cease.

Then there are those who never clap when you are doing really well. They remain unmoved when everyone else erupts in rapturous praise due to your achievements. These people must be marked and never forgotten. They are advanced ‘lukewarmites’.

Some might clap for you but while their palms hit each other repeatedly, the expression on their face tells you that their hearts are not in the applause. For such people, they have imagined your face is their left palm and they are striking your face with the right palm but it looks like clapping to the world. The roar of the crowd as they clap might flatter you but note the ones with sealed lips. They are moderate ‘lukewarmites’.

Great achievement comes through years of dedicated and tenacious application of one’s self to a goal.  There are many steps along this journey and those that are close enough can see the daily grind. Some might hear you rejoicing about a small victory and they respond by saying “stop showing off”.  These kind of people love to put you in your place. This type will never put anyone in a higher place. It is always a relegation to a lower place with them.  Another tactic they use is to watch you work and then call you a workaholic trying to solve repressed psychological issues with overachievement. Note their faces. They want to kill your zeal before you get near to your goal.  These are the mild ‘lukewarmites’ who cannot wait for your achievement to be fully manifested before discouraging you with soft blows.

Note all ‘lukewarmites’ but do not hate them. Never expect anything from them and never tell them your plans because they have nothing motivational to offer you.

A vicious enemy is a better person. They dislike you, and make their feelings known clearly.  They sharpen their criticism all night and unleash it only after marinating it in poison for a few days. With such people, your heart rate goes up, very much unlike ‘lukewarmites’ who have insidious activities that neither makes you sweat or get palpitations. ‘Lukewarmites’ just cause an unease that drains the vitality out of your bones. With vocal enemies you know you are in a battle and you strive to make sure the enemies eat their words. You resolve that your life will not fulfil the predictions of your adversaries.  Many Olympic medals have been won because adversaries push each other to the limit. In The Godfather Part 2 (1974), Michael Corleone said: “My father taught me in this room. He taught me to keep my friends close my enemies closer”.

To that I humbly add, keep the ‘lukewarmites’ in outer space and if you have no rockets parked at the Kennedy Space Centre for transportation, just kick them out.